My acts of selflessness
are those of
a flawed Christ,
and I do not accept
their approbation;
their lauding.
Ostensibly,
I feign modesty
when my actions
are seen and praised,
for I know
my secret motivation.
I never dreamed
I would be walking through life
with someone so
beautiful,
so in order to keep her
I became a different person,
a better person,
to remain in her
circle of grace.
Sensing I will die
long before she will,
I work daily to leave
a legacy
so loving,
inimitable
and unexpected
that she will never
ever
want for any another,
but me.
So,
at the heart
of all this
grandiose selflessness
is a niggling kernel:
selfishness.
(Written for OpenLinkNight at dversepoets.com)
very well penned...some acts of selflessness are not as selfless as they look on first view..and sometimes the border is thin..still she can be happy to have someone who cares so well for her..smiles
ReplyDeleteOh, MAN can I ever relate to this, my friend. Your motives are truer than you know. We are our own worst critics. Excellent write.
ReplyDeleteVery nice portrait of a selfish unselfish man ~
ReplyDeleteIf we can become a better person because of another, I think its a noble aim ~
Amen brother; married well above my pay grade. always shamed when those days go by where I don't work that hard to keep her.
ReplyDeleteSelfish indeed. But honest and a beautiful piece.
ReplyDeletethanks for your comment
Brilliant the irony of it. Very well packaged and released on the last line.
ReplyDeleteI guess we all want this but, uppermost in your mind must be your desire to always see her happy, with or (if you passed away before she does) without you. At least you know (and understand) your thoughts about it
ReplyDeleteLovely piece.
I can respect the honesty that comes with knowing your being selfish...and a love so strong that knowing doesn't make a difference. Fantastic pen!
ReplyDeletei have met very few truly selfless people...usually there is that kernel...and on the flip side its important in that changing to meet the need that you never lose the self...
ReplyDeleteSo well written! I once heard that in every relationship, one partner loves more deeply and fully than the other--and I suspect that is true--how can we not turn toward that and embrace being loved so deeply--
ReplyDelete@AudreyHowitt
Very nice. I suspect there is a bit of selfishness in most attempts at selflessness. We are human, after all, and the epitome of selfish. Peace, Linda
ReplyDeleteNice...and good to be a better person for the one you love.
ReplyDeleteI think selfishness is a good thing in moderation. We have to take care of and love ourselves in order to do the same for others.
ReplyDeleteNice write! (And I mean NIIIIICE not (ho hum) nice.)
oMosk, this is a beautiful and caring poem. The more I read of your poetry the more I am sure your wife is one fortunate woman. You may be a 'flawed Christ,' but you try hard. Christ would approve.
ReplyDeleteWe are all flawed and come into the world exploring first finger & toes. The unbelievable think about humans is that they will trade "free will" for duty, responsibility, and love. This is a great poetic exploration of it, and a gratifying revelation as well. Well done!
ReplyDeletei bet she loves you in way you have never imagined. i think all love has a kernel of selfishness, the need that is best when it is mutual...
ReplyDeleteand the best love does make both people better.
...and if we each dig deep, or merely scratch the surface a little we all find...ourselves! I think I could live with your brand of selfishness:)
ReplyDeleteWhether this is autobiographical or not, I think many of us can relate to the self-aggrandizement gene disguised as altruism so much of the time ... and who cares if it's on behalf of someone else? If it makes the world a better place - I think we're all going to have to live with that ... at least that's been my rationale for - well, forever. Cool poem, Mosk.
ReplyDeleteThis is so relatable, and honest. We do become what the loved one wants and expects. A most courageous write! Bravo!
ReplyDeleteas long as love itself is pure and both individuals feel the truth of that...perhaps selfless and selfish aren't even relevant?
ReplyDeletewe should all be so selfish...lovely expression in this! ~ Rose
ReplyDeleteBuddah, one quality of yours that is truly impressive is your ability to write about yourself as seen through your own lens. You are at times too hard on yourself, I think, and yet you are all the better writer for it. Any man who is able to cop to his own foibles is every woman's dream partner... and some men's as well, but we won't go there!! Loved this write, bruddah. Ameleh
ReplyDeletehttp://sharplittlepencil.wordpress.com/2012/02/08/ive-been-there-plus-more-on-freds-book/