He sits on the knuckle
of my “fuck you” finger.
I've had him removed
at least 7 times
but he must like me
because he keeps coming back
bigger
and uglier than ever.
They tried cutting him off,
freezing him off,
burning him off with putrid chemicals,
but he returns,
unrepentant
and defiant.
I try not
to obsess over him,
he’s less than
an inch
so I try to keep him
in proper perspective.
If I fight him
and just try
to rip him off with my teeth
I’ll only end up
bloody
and the sonofabitch
will just return again.
Why do you love me so much?
I can almost
forget you’re there
as I gesticulate when I speak
sometimes enamored
with my own brilliance
and I know my listener
is similarly enthralled,
but then I catch a glimpse of you
and I become self-conscious
and my timing gets shot
and my soliloquy dries up
and I rein in my hands.
Even if I wanted to show
my wedding ring
everyone will see
the goddamned wart,
but perhaps that
is his purpose:
to remind me that
while I sometimes
temporarily delude
myself into thinking
that I am perfect
I am not,
but also to remind me
that I don’t have to be perfect
to be lovable to someone
warts and all.
ha its great when you know you are loved regardless...i had a couple warts when younger...mine did not love me after freezing him off...but you know if we can keep that lesson you got...maybe its for the better...
ReplyDeleteWarts--hate them--I used to get them all the time as a kid--not so much now--but you are lovable--warts and all--smiles to you!
ReplyDeleteLast lines: damn straight! Perfection is highly over-rated....and boring.
ReplyDeleteyeah - we don't have to be perfect - and everyone has their very own sort of wart they cannot get rid of...
ReplyDeletewarts and all. :) the perfect sentiment to end this. good to see you, friend Mosk!
ReplyDeleteYes -- love it! And you. <3
ReplyDeleteThe proper way to remove a wart:
ReplyDelete1. Take the bag of chocolate coins you got for Easter, and remove the chocolate coins.
2. Decide it would be cool to see if the plastic bag will burn if you light it with a match.
3. Light a match and touch it to one end of the plastic net bag.
4. Holy crap, it burns 10,000 miles an hour, put it out, put it out!
5. Shake the flames out, inadvertently spraying molten plastic into the air.
6. Realize one of the drops of molten plastic has landed on your wart.
7. Muffle your screams of pain, and peel off the now not-so-molten plastic. Realize you have third degree burns on your wart.
8. Consider telling your mom, but then decide not to because you weren't even supposed to have matches in your room anyway.
9. Over the next few weeks, realize you've finally gotten rid of that ugly wart.
10. Also realize you also have an ugly scar where it used to be.
Mosk, that's all I've got.
But your friends DO love you, warts and all, so don't worry about it too much. ^_^
I imagine that pesky friend of yours is quite hard to ignore...why does he love you indeed. I like the optimistic insight at the end.
ReplyDeleteit's been awhile...nice to see you again.
The proper way to remove a wart:
ReplyDelete1. Take the bag of chocolate coins you got for Easter, and remove the chocolate coins.
2. Decide it would be cool to see if the plastic bag will burn if you light it with a match.
3. Light a match and touch it to one end of the plastic net bag.
4. Holy crap, it burns 10,000 miles an hour, put it out, put it out!
5. Shake the flames out, inadvertently spraying molten plastic into the air.
6. Realize one of the drops of molten plastic has landed on your wart.
7. Muffle your screams of pain, and peel off the now not-so-molten plastic. Realize you have third degree burns on your wart.
8. Consider telling your mom, but then decide not to because you weren't even supposed to have matches in your room anyway.
9. Over the next few weeks, realize you've finally gotten rid of that ugly wart.
10. Also realize you also have an ugly scar where it used to be.
Mosk, that's all I've got.
But your friends DO love you, warts and all, so don't worry about it too much. ^_^
Of COURSE it posted twice. *facepalm*
Delete