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Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Easy for Paul to Say

They play house
in their $45 a day
rented motel room
off the desert freeway
every weekend
and think that
it’s Love,

but since she fell
in Love
(and bed)
with him
I haven’t seen
much of her
lately.

She never admits
that’s where she goes,
but it’s a small town
and a quick drive-by
provides (qu)easy
confirmation.

I remain helplessly
at a distant,
not knowing
what to do.

I only know
what not to do:

I don’t tell her
to stop seeing
him.

I don’t tell her
he’s just using
her young and
pliable body.

I don’t even tell her
how hurt I am.

I know it wouldn’t
make a difference.

I try remember
1 Corinthians 13
where it says

“love is patient,
love is kind,
love does not demand
its own way”

and that’s easy
for Paul to say,

he didn’t have a daughter
who spent her weekends
at the Motel 6 in Rubidoux
with someone who
makes her pay
for the room
(so said
the mislaid receipt).

My anger flattens out
into profound
despair
when I consider
that maybe
my daughter and I
don’t love each other
so much right now.

[Posted for #OpenLinkNight - at dversepoets.com - a wonderful place to find other poets]

29 comments:

  1. oh mosk..this breaks my heart...i can imagine how tough this must be...prayers and hugs..

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    1. Thanks Claudia. Yes, I feel like I'm writing about this a lot - This is my way of trying to come to grips with this. Thanks for the prayers. :)

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  2. Out of the frying pan into the fire, my poor bruddah's little girl.

    The receipt must have killed you. BREATHE.

    This, taken as a poem, is wonderful. This, taken as a commentary from a person I love, is sad. Maybe you don't like each other right now? Not loving hardens the heart.

    Girls. God, I know my parents didn't go through this was me cuz I was a "dog" in those days. I will pray that your little girl starts to see what the situation really is. Pray and pray again. Love from your sistah, Ameleh

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    1. Thanks, Ameleh. There are so many little clues that have taken a bit out of me, I have almost run out of plotz-ability! No, don't get me wrong - I know we love one another, but by Paul's description neither of us meets that bar.

      Ha! I refuse to believe you were a "dog" - not my sistah from another mistah! Love, Moskaroo

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  3. True dilemma... damned if you do and damned if you don't... hope time will bring a change.

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    1. Thanks, and I'm sure it will - that's what time does best.

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  4. Oh, it's so, so hard to stand back and watch them make mistakes and learn things the hard way. So hard to not say the things you want to say, to stop them from making those mistakes. Have hope that it will all be okay in the end. And your love will find its way back to each other.

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    1. Thanks for your kind words and your support. Yes, this is just a tough time, that's all.

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  5. Buddah, your daughter must find herself, even if you have a desire to interfere. She is your daughter and will always love you. I wish for the best outcome on this.

    Pamela

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    1. I agree, and I have no desire to interfere. I just wish it was different. Of course, we will always love one another. Thanks for your kind wishes.

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  6. Hugs from South Texas as you write yourself through a difficult season of life...may things go from write to right, soon. <3 (Thanks, by the way, for your visits and comments.)

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    1. Thanks, Paula. I appreciate your hopefulness. Yes, it's a season.

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  7. Anonymous5:28 PM

    The poem was just so good, but just so heart breaking because it wasn't fiction. Love and prayers, poet friend. I remember my own experiences with oldest daughter, and that sick feeling that went with it. - deb

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    1. I knew you'd understand, my fellow parent. Thanks for your kindness.

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  8. Oh that's such a hard thing to deal with...it's heartbreaking situation, I feel for you... your daughter loves you and when she realises her mistake, you'll be her strength. I hope all comes back into balance soon... best wishes to you.

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    1. Thanks, yes, I know, but it's tough seeing this woman who usd to be my daughter

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  9. This so powerful and so heartbreaking. Fine writing, Mosk.

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    1. Thanks, MamaZen, you're very kind.

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  10. I love the what not to do...
    maybe the what to do?
    Lay out the cash, buy back a day, ask her if this is how she imagines forever...
    as a daddy's girl I can say - nothing raises the bar on the other man, then knowing your daddy loves (praises, believes, encourages, hopes, cares) for you so much more.
    If you out-love him, you won't out-love her.

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    1. Thanks for the shared wisdom. I've never known anyone who admits to being a daddy's girl, so I appreciate the insight.

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  11. I don't have children...but o, I feel your pain here, Mosk. To watch your child making painful mistakes and having to stand by and do, say nothing. But we can't live the lives of others. The fledglings must fly w. their own feathers. I hope things get better soon. A great write, I might add. xo

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    1. Thanks, and I know things will get better, :) I'm just trying to make sense of it.

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  12. This is heartbreaking. I think that, contrary to the last line that there is a lot of love for her shown in the poem.

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    1. Thanks, and yes, always love.

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  13. "heartbreaking" is the word i'm seeing over and over here... and it is. ouch, Mosk. the most wrenching thing i've read today. i can't imagine. the title line is perfect.

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    1. Thanks Joanna. I am a little heartbroken. I hope it was most wrenching for the subject matter and not for the sucky technique. Thanks for your comment on the title.

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  14. I didn't have parents around to watch me make mistakes. If I had, I would have still made those mistakes, but it would have been wonderful to know they were there and (patiently?) watching. I probably wouldn't have seemed appreciative, but the nevertheless it would of meant the world. If they'd written this about me, I'd be in tears, hugging and kissing them! A tender write.

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  15. beautiful, touching, and raw. very full of emotion. there is a longing hidden here; I hope one day it finds peace.

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  16. breezing through some of your work, found this one particularly poignant; felt it very deeply (have grown children of my own); all the best wishes

    "...easy
    for Paul to say,

    he didn’t have a daughter"

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