Monday, March 25, 2013

Just Friends

For a young man
who never made 
women swoon,
never caused
the blush of blood
in a woman’s breast,
her stories were,
at first, titillating.

In her many
business travels
she would arrange
to meet men
in foreign cities,
and with only 
the slightest wisps
of personal data,
she would
offer herself
in anonymous hotel rooms
as a submissive,
to be tied up,
swatted and flagellated,
her ample plump frame,
for a crumb of attention.

Distance demanded
that nothing would ever come
from our email friendship,
so I just listened
without judgement,
trying to understand.

She had an estranged father,
a mother dying from cancer,
and it wasn’t my place
to do anything but
be a friend.

So I just listened
as the phone calls mounted,
laughing and mirroring
each other,
each call affirming
each other.

Months later,
one spring afternoon,
she cc’d me on
a mass mailing
that she sent
to the dozens of partners
she’d met along
her loneliness,

and she told them
she decided
she wasn’t
doing that anymore.

She decided
she didn’t want

In a separate note,
she credited me
with giving her the strength
to move into
the next phase of her life,
where she eventually
fell in love,
got married
and had a son.

to all you women
who weren’t
attracted to me
and I either had to learn
to be “just friends”
with you
or lose your friendship,

thank you.


  1. I was a little nervous at first about the topic of the email, but quite glad to here she was giving it up. the opening made me smile, the next verse...well it made me feel sorry for her. the end quite touching.

    1. Thank you - all those years of being just friends paid off.

  2. stuff...first to touch a life like that...its a beautiful thing, its being a friend and being patience and be there...that was enough to move me....but great close on this as well...mmm...good stuff man...

  3. I think this is magnificent, for about nine different reasons. It's brave and it's outre in a very matter of fact way. It's human and it's hopeful. I absolutely love this poem.

    1. Thanks, Shay. Yes, she and I were good friends for a couple of years there. Yes, we were matter of fact outre.

  4. wow, Mosk. a testament to what friendship can do. thank you for sharing this.

    1. Thanks, when she told me that I helped her leave that life, I was speechless, a rare state for me.

  5. Mosk, this was beautiful. Not many men will stick with a friendship in this way; usually it's "put out or get out." You are that rare man who has the power to transform women's lives because you actually believe us to be PEOPLE. Radical, I know.

    My best date/not date was the guy who came out as gay and thanked me publicly for helping him realize it. I had so many gay male and lesbian friends, he began to feel comfortable with his own identity. My friend Jeffrey (who used to call me "breeder") said it was proof positive that even straight girls could recruit. Ha ha ha ha. I love you. Ameleh